Surrounded

Today I read James 1:

v2"Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opputunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing..."

 It's often that I stumble on verses that are totally irrelevant to my life. But last night I prayed that this morning I would read something I needed to read, and here it was waiting for me. I started off glancing over the heavily annotated text, and not really taking it in as I should have. I read it several times until I "understood" and then I decided to pray and meditate over it. I found, as I went over the text in my mind, that although I had read it several times I had already forgotten what it had said beacause I had not internalized it nor committed it to action, just like it said I would...

""For if you listen to the word and don't obey, it is like glacing at your face in a mirror. You see yourself, walk away, and forget what you look like. But if you look carefully into the perfect law that sets you free and if you DO what it says and dont FORGET what you heard , then God will belss you for doing it."

And so, sitting in meditatiation I neglected the urge to repick up my Bible and instead scratched the recesses of my memory to retrieve what I had read exactly and understand what it meant for me. I found that not only do I NEED to go through the struggles I am currently facing but that I should also be grateful for what they are doing for my faith.

 Changing from faithless to faith-full thinking means not being stingy. Stingy with "my" time, with  "my" money, with "my" kindness, with "my" patience, with "my" listening, but most of all with "my" love. I am the daughter of the creater. Which means everything I need and everything I have is his. I don't need to be rude to the landlord who refuses to fix my rusty bathtub BECAUSE I know that I am surrounded by the source of all love. And I can spare more than a little patience and kindness with her although she does not exactly deserve  it at the time, because my love comes from a bottomless wellspring.  I can afford to be patienct, and loving, and kind to all because I am surrounded by the original love.

And I now have the courage to let go of what I held onto so tightly: my bitterness, my greed, my rudeness, my impatience, my pride, my fear because this was behaviour of poverty and I am rich with love. I dont need to love like these things are in scarcity because I am SURROUNDED by them, my cup runneth over. I just need to have faith that if I share my love, my smile, etc God will be right there to pour it back into my cup overflowing.

I get it ...at least I get this...NOW TO LIVE IT ^-^!!!

Lessons from Eat Pray Love

Perhaps one of my favorite scenes, from one of my all time favorite movies: Eat Pray Love. Is the scene where Liz talks of the history of this building in Rome (built underground) that is called the Augusteum. This building has "endured" so much change: first being a monument to the greatness of Augustus,then destroyed, used as shelter, used as a storage container for fireworks, again used as monument for the greatness of Mussolini, rebuilt, then destroyed again, and now used as a place for homeless people to stay and use the bathroom.

Life happens to all of us. It happens- and has happened to me. I was not "cool" in middle school. Eventually I  changed schools enough times and was voted president of my high school and ended up dating this amazing "jock." I was respected (at least to my face) and held respectable jobs for my age. Then I graduated and life happened and everything changed. I was living back at home, friends "deserted me" and I had to start from scratch. Everyone counted me out. Then I got into a really great university on the fly, ended up recording a CD, and made some amazing life long friendship and then everyone came flocking back. Soon, even I forgot that who I was wasn't attached to approval or title. And now here I am at another "ebb" in this strange river of life with it's ebbs and flows- to be reminded and to learn a new lesson.

The lessons learned from monuments are innumerable; but I have two here for you. 1.) Never stick yourself in a box. A label. Life is like a river and you are like a rock in that river, today you might be large: a CEO, a president, attractive, a big fish in a small pond...whatever. But tomorrow...tomorrow, you might  hit a boulder and become a pebble: a janitor, a nanny, unattractive, big fish in an even bigger ocean. We are not stagnant beings. Our roles change but... (and this brings us to point number two)

You are still you at the end of the day. Maybe your life has been hectic like the Augusteum, or that rock. But you are still what God made on that first day when he thought of you. When he knew the plans he had for you. And don't you forget it! Sure you were once great in the eyes of the world and now the world views you as small. But who is the world ANYWAY in the grand scheme of things. Know thyself, you are and will always be a part of the larger. A child of the king- who does not see things as man sees them. An extension of the Universe. Titles like Prince and Pauper have no leeway in that realm, they're just silly names and labels the world uses to feel comfortable. You are still you. I am still me, and will continue to hold my head up high no matter the circumstance, or titles thrown at me. Because I know who and WHO's I am.